Based upon your reading of the Wood (2020) textbook, your viewing of the module videos, analyze a past experience with conflict that went wrong for you. Explain what went wrong. Explain the steps you would take to improve the situation if you could go back in time and re-do it.
- A clear introduction paragraph that grabs the readers’ attention, states your thesis statement (main idea), and previews the points you will use to support your thesis.
- Body paragraph(s). Write one paragraph for each supporting point, or one single paragraph that addresses each of the supporting points.
- A conclusion paragraph that re-addresses your thesis, summarizes your supporting points, and ties it all together with a final thought.
Format your essay with the following requirements:
– This writing assignment should use 300 words.
– Put your name, course and section number, and assignment title on the cover page.
– Use one-inch margins.
– Use a 12-point Times New Roman font.
– Use double line spacing in the document.
– Include a References page where you cite your sources in APA format.
– Cite the sources that you use to back-up the thesis of your paper with in-text parenthetical citations using APA citation style. (opens in a new window)
– Use at least five (5) terms or concepts from the Wood (2020) text and make them bold
(*You must use these terms in a way that clearly indicates that you know what they mean. You should not list terms. You should use them in context and define them in your own words)
Managing Conflict in Relationships
Many, if not everyone, has been in a conflict at some point in their lives, with close friends, spouses, family members, and even business partners. I recall when I got into an interpersonal conflict with my best friend, Naomi, over a weekend gate away. Naomi and I always spent time together over the weekends. However, a few of my elementary school friends had visited the town, and I got an invitation for a weekend getaway. One week after the gate away, I invited Naomi over to my house for the weekend, after which she declined, claiming that she had “plans with other friends”. Later that day, I learned that Naomi’s excuse was merely a covert reaction to my previous decision, after which we engaged in a heated argument. Failure to address our conflict effectively cost us our friendship; reflecting on that event, I believe things would have been different if we addressed the matter using the three steps proposed by Clair Canfield and adopted the VOCAB.
As I reflect on my past interpersonal conflict, I perceive that it could have been handled differently if my friend and I followed the three steps proposed by Clair Canfield. Canfield argues that conflict should be managed by learning what it is about, recognizing when one is stuck, and learning to speak responsibly using the VOCAB (Canfield, 2016). In this context, Naomi and I should have discussed the situation calmly to create a supportive climate and uncover any deeper worries surrounding the conflict. The VOCAB, an acronym of vulnerability, ownership, communication, acceptance, and boundaries, would also have helped us handle the situation more differently. Arguably, the five elements would have helped us connect, take account of our choices without feeling blameless, and listen and express ourselves effectively. The VOCAB would also have assisted us in embracing the truth, let go of issues beyond our control, and set the ground rules for ourselves our friendship.
In essence, following the three steps of conflict management proposed by Clair Canfield and the VOCAB would have helped improve the interpersonal conflict between my friend and I. Notably, exploring the deeper issues that contributed to the conflict, failure to justify our mistakes, and speaking more responsibly and constructively would have made the situation different. Although the case may not be undone, the event was a valuable lesson for conflict management.
References
Canfield, C. (2016, December 1). The beauty of conflict [YouTube Video]. TEDx. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=55n9pH_A0O8